Thursday, June 20, 2013

It's June already!

On the 21st, this week, we will experience the longest day of the year.  Last night, sitting next to my mom she looked at me, took my hand, and said "I don't think I'm going to live much longer".  Talk about an attack on my heart! I know she isn't well, I know she is old (90 later this year!) but still, she is my mom, I love her, like her and enjoy her company. In the years since  her husband died we have become very close. My response was "Well, hang in there as long as you can.".

The segue from the longest day of the year to my mom is this: after the twenty-first of June the days get shorter and now the time I left with my mom is getting shorter. I want to think about how I want to spend this time.  The first thing I am doing is spending more time with her. I travel down every two to three weeks to stay with her, go to doctor appointments, do paperwork and visit.  I am sad to see her physically getting smaller and smaller. Part of the process, I guess.

Sitting with  mom on the couch, holding her hand, reminds me too much of the same period of time in my younger sister's life, when she was dying of cancer and I had the privilege of spending time with her.
I hope I am a comfort to mom. I hope I can pass her heritage down to my children and grandson.  I hope I get through this with grace.

I hope my sense of humor reflects hers and remains intact.  Prayers, please.